Now that I have your full and undivided attention…  Did you really think that I would just let you Phillies Phans have a repeat?  Let you have a dynasty?  There’s only ONE dynasty in baseball, you slack jawed idiots!  The original Evil Empire, my New York Yankees.  I do tire of winning so much, and I might give the rest of Major League Baseball a chance.  The key word is: MIGHT.

EHHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE!  Stupid baseball fans, don’t you realize I own the umpires?  I own the front offices.  I even own that five dollar haircut bastard, Bud Selig!  As long as I remain alive, my red toned apprentice will dominate as he should have years ago.

Look at your new Darth Maul, people.  Alex has now been fully assimilated into the Dark Side!  With Darth Tyrannus Jeter at my side, we shall become unstoppable!  EHHEHHEHEHEHEHEHE!

You think you’ve got us down, Steinbrenner.  No, the Rebel Alliance of Phillies Phans decide when you have us down.  Don’t worry, Evil Empire.  Chutley will be back hitting harder than Luke Skywalker with his metal hand.  Oh, and before I forget.  The battle cry of the sports blog commentariat against you, Darth Sidious Steinbrenner…

FUCK YANKEES!  COCK!

You heard the man, patrons!  Start griping!

Raise a Glass

Put the Glass Down

Tags: bitch thread, CHUTLEY!, fuck Darth Sidious Steinbrenner, Fuck Yankees! COCK!, fuck you bud selig, James Brown, Liquid Lunch
Categories: Liquid Lunch

This entry was posted on Thursday, November 5th, 2009 at 12:00 pm and is filed under Liquid Lunch. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.