Who’s got two thumbs and would love to find out more about how one gets a job in professional sports? This Guy, who continues to make it his personal mission to increase awareness of the FAI League of Ireland, with the hopes of it one day becoming the fourth major sport in the United States (replacing, of course, the NBA). In this week’s Eye on the LOI, we’ll break down the big derby match between This Guy’s beloved St. Pat’s and First Derivative’s warmly appreciated Sligo Rovers. We’ll begin the funeral arrangements for the league‘s most popular team, and find proof that Shamrock Rovers thinks everyone else in the league stinks. Here we go…
The Results – Go, Go, Go, Sligo!
Featured Match: Sligo Rovers 2-0 St. Patrick’s Athletic
It was quite a premier at The Showgrounds for Sligo’s Eoin Doyle and Matthew Blinkhorn, leading Rovers to victory in the Phoenix Pub Derby. Doyle opened the scoring 18 minutes into his Sligo career, while Blinkhorn tallied in the second half of what was just his second start. It was an especially big win for the Bit O‘Red, who in taking all three points now move just two points behind the Saints for seventh position on the league table. Remember, the eighth through tenth place teams face the danger of relegation at the end of the season.
The season series between the two clubs is now even at 1-1-1. The Saints simply did not show up for this one, but perhaps not without just cause. St. Pat’s is currently participating in the UEFA Europa League (formerly UEFA Cup), the European tournament one step down from the world famous Champions League. St. Pat’s spent Wednesday in Malta, where a 1-0 win over Valletta FC secured a berth in the tournament’s third qualifying round (this Thursday against Russia’s Krylia Sovetov). Thus, it should come as no surprise that Sligo won Sunday’s match, since the Bit O’Red were eliminated from Europa League in the first qualifying round almost a month ago. But no, really, big win for the Sligo.
Elsewhere, Sunday’s LOI slate served up a delicious double main event, a la Wrestlemania VIII, as the top four teams in the league squared off. Status quo was maintained, however, as Bohemians tied Shamrock Rovers, leaving Bohs five points wide of Rovers for first place. Meanwhile, Cork City and Derry City ended in a 1-1 draw, as neither side could gain the three points needed to make up ground on the two frontrunners.
Meanwhile, the third leg (insert penis joke here) of the Louth Derby went to Dundalk, as the Lilywhites easily handled Drogheda United, 4-2. Scottish striker Alex Williams has four goals in four games since being acquired by Dundalk. The 26-year-old tallied twice in this one, moving his side eight points clear of the relegation places.
Finally, Galway United improved its standing by defeating hapless Bray Wanderers, 2-1. United jumped St. Patrick’s on the league table to claim sixth place, while Wanderers remain “rooted to the foot of the table” (as the league website’s match report put it. Seriously, read these things. Phenomenal stuff.). In any event, Jay O’Shea’s winner in the 90th minute propelled Galway from a draw to a victory, and left the Carlisle Grounds faithful stunned. Fortunately, this was probably only about six or seven people.
Fifteen weeks to go, and the league table looks like this (team, points): Bohemians, 45; Shamrock Rovers, 40; Cork City, 37; Derry City, 35; Dundalk, 29; Galway United, 25; St. Patrick’s Athletic, 23; Sligo Rovers, 21; Drogheda United, 19; Bray Wanderers, 18.
For a complete look at the league table, CLICK HERE!
The Preview – The Russians (and Bulgarians) are Coming!
League action gets underway early this week with a pair of Europa League matchups on Thursday. As mentioned, St. Patrick’s Athletic hosts Krylia Sovetov (head spinning with Red Dawn references), while Derry City battles CSKA Sofia in Sofia at Bulgarian Army Stadium. Did you know Bulgaria had an army? Me neither.
Quick aside: CSKA Sofia is under new ownership that has announced plans for a new stadium in place of the current 22,015-seat Bulgarian Army Stadium, which was built in 1923. However, construction will only begin if CSKA Sofia qualifies for the group stages of the Europa League. That means beating Derry City and winning yet another round of qualifying. America needs more sports where ownership says, “Listen, 2008 Mets, if you collapse down the stretch again, we’re gonna turn these plans right around, and you can kiss that new ballpark goodbye, and you’ll just play here.” This may actually be one explanation on why you never hear plans to build a new Wrigley Field.
Anyways, once the exhausted Saints and Candystripes (yes, it’s Derry City who are the Candystripes!) get done with their Thursday matches, we move forward to Premier Division action over the weekend. On Friday, first place Bohemians travels to United Park to take on Drogheda United. While this may seem like a walkover for the defending champs, the Drogs have actually played the Gypsies well this season. While Bohs enjoys a 3:1 goal differential on the season, they’ve managed just a pair of 1-0 victories over Drogheda United. Nonetheless, this should be a walkover for the defending champs.
Cork City will have an excellent chance to pick up three points on somebody, as the teams directly ahead and directly behind City do battle while the Rebel Army faces league doormat Bray Wanderers on Friday. Distractions, however, may be an issue for Cork City, if there is a Cork City at all. More on this later. Meanwhile, second place Shamrock Rovers hosts fourth place Derry City on Sunday, giving Cork a chance to either move up on Rovers or put some distance between themselves and Derry City. Follow? Good.
Silgo Rovers’ win last weekend was its first in seven games, a drought stretching back to May 29. Momentum will be the name of the game as the Bit O’Red visits Galway United on Friday. United’s win last week moved them from seventh to sixth place. No doubt the breathing room feels good, and the Tribesmen would love to pick up three more points in an effort to scratch their way closer to fifth. Meanwhile, Sligo Rovers could well find itself out of the relegation playoff if they’re able to claim three.
Finally, St. Patrick’s Athletic takes on a tough but spotty Dundalk side. Alex Williams has been hotter than hell, and it will be up to the Saints to stop him, lest it be Armageddon for home side (these Book of Revelation references doing anything for ya?). A loss coupled with a Sligo win would drop St. Pat’s into eighth place and the relegation playoffs, the LOI equivalent of Sandworm Land from “Beetlejuice.”
HERE’S everything you need to know heading into this weekend’s action!
The News
Cork may not float after all…
Cork City is the best-supported team in the entire LOI. While the league attendance average sits around 2,000 fans per game, supporters of the Rebel Army routinely pack into Turners Cross 4,000-5,000 strong. This is what makes the situation in Cork so sad and shocking, as it appears unlikely that Cork City FC will exist beyond this season.
The club owes 440,000 Euro (roughly $617,102 US) to the Revenue Commissioners, the Irish equivalent of the IRS, and doesn’t seem to have the means to pay it. This past Monday, club chairman Tom Coughlin brought 110,000 Euro to the High Court in an attempt to appease an earlier payment plan, but was rejected. Justice Mary Laffoy ordered the company to be “wound up,” which is exactly what it sounds like. However, Laffoy granted a stay of execution till Friday to give Cork City one last chance to come up with the rest of the money.
Coughlin was put in an impossible spot when he took over Cork City last year. The team almost went out of business before he arrived, with debts exceeding 800,000, leading to a 10-point deduction penalty of the team by the league, and the wage reduction or outright laying off of several staff members. In October, the High Court accepted Coughlin’s bid to take over the club from previous ownership, and ended its examination of the company.
But problems persisted from the outset and continued into the season. In March, Irish soccer scribe Neil Ahern reported that star fullback Danny Murphy had been left unpaid for the first month of the season, and was asked to renegotiate his contract from two years to one. This week, all of City’s players were told they can start looking for new clubs.
The team is trying to do what it can to come up with at least half of the owed money by Friday. The hope is that half up front and future monthly installments will appease the Revenue, but there is no guarantee that this will be the case, or even that Cork City can raise that much money before the Friday deadline. On Monday, the team issued a statement on the High Court’s ruling on its website, urging fans to purchase tickets for this Friday’s game in advance. The “Buy Tickets!” icon you see on any sports franchise’s website these days now reads, without any punctuation “Buy Tickets Now Help Save Our Club.” It is as simple as that, and yet it may not be enough. On Wednesday, City began appealing its fans to make donations directly into the team’s bank account.
If these and other efforts fail, and the club is indeed liquidated, Ireland’s second largest city would find itself without a representative in the league’s Premier Division. Cork City has been the league’s most popular club in recent years, and has enjoyed a run of success that would make its sudden demise all the more tragic. Cork City won the league title in 1992, 1993 and 2005, and celebrated an FAI Cup as recently as 2007 (their other win was in 1998). Just last year, the organization captured the Setanta Sports Cup, and this year sit third on the league table, which would be good enough to qualify for Europa League next year.
These developments of course have an impact on the entire League of Ireland itself. The FAI released its own statement after the High Court’s ruling on Monday, and is prepared to deal with the impending situation of Cork City disappearing. There is precedent for this, with Dublin City going belly-up three years ago, and there is a contingency plan in place for if and when the same fate befalls Cork City. The Rebel Army’s results from this year would be expunged from the record, and no other club would be automatically relegated to the First Division at the end of the year.
There will certainly be much more to come regarding this story in the next 48 hours. You’ll be able to find a full update in This Space.
Setanta Claus is coming to town…
The draw for the 2009-10 Setanta Sports Cup was announced this week, and this year’s field of nine teams is the biggest since the tournament was introduced in 2005. Five LOI clubs will represent the league in this year’s proceedings, which begin in late August and continue through next May (seriously, is David Stern in charge of the scheduling for this league?).
In Group A, defending cup champs and soon-to-be non-existent Cork City is joined by Sligo Rovers and Cliftonville. Group B features juggernaut Bohemians, making their debut in this tournament, and Northern Ireland reps Glentoran and Coleraine. Finally, Group C is comprised of Derry City and St. Patrick’s Athletic from the LOI, and Linfield from Northern Ireland.
Each group brings a unique story to the draw. In Group A, the story is obviously Cork City. B is for Bohemians, as the Gypsies stack up against less familiar competition.
In Group C, two LOI squads face a Linfield side that won the inaugural tournament four years ago.
For a complete look at the draw and the group stage fixtures, CLICK HERE!
LOEye On – Bohemians FC
In our first installment of “LOEye On…” we take a look at the league’s current powerhouse. Bohemians is a founding member of the league, with the club dating back to 1890, and has played in the league’s Premier Division since the league was founded in 1921. Based in Dublin and with most of their support drawn from the north side of the city, Bohemians goes by the nicknames Bohs or Gypsies, and has played its home matches at Dalymount Park since it opened in 1901. The official team colors are red and black, and the club is second only to Shamrock Rovers in terms of overall success.
History: Bohemians has won 10 league titles (including three this decade) and seven FAI Cups. Three times (1927-28, 2000-01, 2008) the club has achieved the “double,“ winning the league and the FAI Cup in the same season. Bohs recent success has seen them often involved in UEFA events like Champions League or UEFA Cup (now Europa League). Despite not playing European competition until the 1970’s, Bohemians has now played in and won more matches in Europe than any other LOI club.
Recently: This season, Bohemians is once again on track to claim championship glory. The Gypsies lead the league table by five points, and remain alive and well in both FAI Ford Cup and EA Sports Cup competition. They are also competing in Setanta Sports Cup for the first time this season, and it isn’t unreasonable to think this squad might be able to pull off the “quadruple.” But it‘s not all sunshine and lollipops for this group. The team dealt with its first heartache in quite some time last week when it was eliminated from Champions League on a late goal by Red Bull Salzburg.
Keep and LOEye On: Formidable forward Jason Byrne, whose 17 goals account for more than half of the team total (33). Byrne won three league titles with Shelbourne from 2003-2006, a four-year stretch in which he was the league’s top scorer all four years (a league record).
Boh-file
Manager: Pat Fenlon (2007-)
League Championships (10): 1923-24, 1927-28, 1929-30, 1933-34, 1935-36, 1974-75, 1977-78, 2000-01, 2002-03, 2008
FAI Cup (7): 1928, 1935, 1970, 1976, 1992, 2001, 2008
Most Goals: Turlough O’Connor – 192
Most Goals (League): Glen Crowe – 130
Most Goals (Season): Glen Crowe – 25
The Product – Shamrock Rovers Thinks Your Team Stinks
Long before Vince Shlomi got into fistfights with hookers and murdered Billy Mays, the original Sham-Wow was over in Dublin, racking up title after title. There’s been no more successful franchise in LOI history than Shamrock Rovers, and as you might imagine, anything and everything involving them is just that much better. So far superior is Rovers, that neither they nor their front-running proud supporters can stand the stench that emanates from the rest of us.
Thankfully, Rovers’ team website now offers this nifty air freshener, which gives off that oh so familiar aroma. Mmm mmm, smells like victory. Construction crews recently building Hoops’ brand new home, Tallaght Stadium, were stunned to find, right next to the true Grail, a natural spring from which aura and mystique flows from a deep and seemingly limitless underground well. These air fresheners are left to soak in that spring for hours before they are carefully and individually packaged and shipped.
Those who have purchased this air freshener have reported an increase in good feelings and lottery jackpot winnings in their homes. One man recently discovered a million dollars in cash in his attic. He credits the air freshener with setting off the smoke detector and eventually leading him to this finding. Another woman hung the air freshener in her car and was T-boned by an 18-wheeler at a traffic signal. She survived, but the driver of the much larger vehicle was less fortunate, and will be buried with his cherished Galway United sweater.
That’s right, Hoops fans, this little air freshener is the best way to bring the glory of the pitch right into your own home or automobile. The sweet smell of success is just a click and four Euro away! Since you could never smell your own shit to begin with, why should you have to smell that of others? Order now!
Coming Soon – An update on the Cork City situation and this week’s More Than the Thumbs. Until then, Sláinte!
Who’s got two thumbs and would love to find out more about how one gets a job in professional sports? This Guy, who continues to make it his personal mission to increase awareness of the FAI League of Ireland, with the hopes of it one day becoming the fourth major sport in the United States (replacing, of course, the NBA). In this week’s Eye on the LOI, we’ll break down the big derby match between This Guy’s beloved St. Pat’s and First Derivative’s warmly appreciated Sligo Rovers. We’ll begin the funeral arrangements for the league‘s most popular team, and find proof that Shamrock Rovers thinks everyone else in the league stinks. Here we go… (more…)
Ed. Note – This was entirely too ludicrous to not write up any longer. Thanks to This Guy for sending me the story. The Eye Opener will function as a season wrap up as well as tell the utterly brilliant Derry City story, which leads off. – FD
